Actions speak louder than words - you've heard that before. But sometimes people approach others seeking advice and they often want to be told what to do rather than shown. That's not always the best way to teach, especially in spiritual matters. Nevertheless, pastors, ministers, priests and spiritual counselors are often put on the spot. People in need of guidance come seeking answers and looking for spiritual solutions.

I knew a man, a Franciscan priest, who tried very hard to live a life of service. He embraced the way of St. Francis of Assisi. He was humble, modest and caring. He was good at preaching the Gospel in the way St. Francis recommended - he preached it always, but used words only when necessary.

Father John Mittelstadt was a big man, probably about six foot four. He had a big heart to go with his tall frame. But he was quiet and didn't draw attention to himself. For many years he served as the pastor of St. Mary's Parish in Tohatchi, New Mexico. This is a tiny town on the Navajo Reservation in Northwest New Mexico. Over the past several years I've attended many weekend retreats with other men, all of us trying to live a life that is of service and helps us be less self-centered. Thy will, not mine is a phrase we all embraced. We would spend weekends in May and in November seeking some serenity and communing with our Higher Power in a place far removed from the hustle and bustle of modern society.

During these retreats Father John insisted on being just another one of us. He didn't want special recognition. He didn't preach or exert authority. He'd offer support, encouragement and he would model a way of interaction that spoke loud and clear - in actions more than words.

A few days ago this fine man and priest passed away. He's suffered from poor health in recent months and was admitted to the hospital last week. It just so happens I work part-time at this hospital and on Sunday I discovered he was a patient. I dropped by for a brief visit after working my shift. We shared a few words. He looked tired and frail. But he hoped to be released in a few days and I hoped for the same. I told him that I and others would keep him in prayer. "Thanks, I sure need that", was his simple reply.

The next day John Mittelstadt, O.F.M. went to be with the Lord. I was shocked and saddened when I got the news. But I'm grateful to have seen him before he died. And I will always remember his great kindness and humility. He will surely be missed by the many whose lives were touched by this man who would not tell you what to do, but would rather share what he did to face life's ups and downs.

God bless you, Father John. Thank you for big heart and your Christlike ways.